My6inchchallenge's Blog
Tackling difficulties and overcoming the challenges life serves up – by Dona HallidayArchive for Natural Hair
In the meantime and in-between time
Be patient with the process
Are you at the place you want to be? How are you handling the in-between time on your way there. I confess, I don’t like the uncertainty of in-between things, this flux of not being here but not quite there. I hate just-below-the-knee dresses. I like my dresses preferably short…, or long. I don’t understand capris, even though I wear them occasionally I take issue with this indecisive garment that can’t decide if it wants to be long or short. It’s unusual for me to buy 1, 2 or 3 inch heels, I like my shoes the way I like my shoes. I find this length of my natural hair somewhat challenging, though it’s growing it is in this in-between stage of being neither long nor short.
But don’t get confused, these are just external, minor, in-between things that I can control to a certain extent. Much of life can find us in “in-between” places dealing with things beyond our control, yet, we have to learn to flourish in these places.
Here are 6 seeds to plant in the soil of “in-betweeness”:
Hope: We don’t all start out on the same playing field, don’t let that make you bitter. Hope in God, seek him in your planning, commit yourself to work your plan, and be steadfast.
Faith: Though this is not a guarantee against pain or hardship it guarantees that the object of our faith, God, loves us, and can take the challenging and the painful and work them for our good and His glory
Peace: Remind yourself of what God says, it will remind you of why you can have peace even in challenging times
Obedience: Offer God the right to yourself, surrender everything of you to him and obey His word.
Common sense: If it took years of unwise decisions to get you to a certain place, be patient with the rectification process, adhere to wise principles and stay committed to change
Gratefulness: Take time and correct faulty thinking. Be thankful! not for everything but in every situation give thanks, the unchanging factor is God.
Hair comes trouble!
Natural Hair Troublemakers
Why don’t you go fix your hair? You look like trouble! That my friends is the voice of my serious nature, my predominant self. I don’t think I was always so serious but at some point in my life I turned into a serious child and then a very serious teenager. As a matter of fact my love for play normally only becomes very evident when I step out of my high heels and slip on sneakers, that is until now… Until I made that transition back to the natural texture of my hair that seemingly released a much more fun-loving me.
“If you don’t behave yourself I’ll straighten your hair and pull it back into a bun,” threatened my serious self. “What did I do?” countered my natural hair self. I really had not done anything. What had happened was that earlier that day there I was in a conversation with this beautiful brown brother, smiling, laughing and being all chatty. ME, being chatty! When he said he loved my outfit, it looked very artistic, I had struck a poise and when he had commented on my shoes I had done a little foot modeling to showcase them.
Miss Serious had butted in with “WHO are you, and what do you think you are doing?” My natural hair self had responded, “I have not done it for a while, but I think I might be flirting.” That’s when the threats had started.
To make matters worse a few weeks prior I had been going about my business not paying attention to anything else in particular when I had run across this other brown brother who I’ve known for over a year. I had not paid him much attention even though my friends thought him handsome and said he was interested, but that day my natural haired self upon seeing him had released a mentally approving “Oooooo”sound as he stood around in a little jersey top and bottom…(obviously I have to develop my descriptive self).
As I relayed the incident to a very close friend I had her in stitches, maybe not so much because of what I was saying but maybe more so because I don’t normally have those conversations. This friend is the one who told me the material I cover in my writing is normally very heavy so this is my attempt to step on the lighter side.
I love both my serious and my fun nature because they help to balance me. However, on behalf of my natural hair self I say to my serious self the trouble I want to cause has nothing to do with my hair or my appearance. I want to cause the Elijah kind of trouble, the Paul and Silas kind of trouble…
I want to trouble those who trouble the weak, the helpless and the innocent, where I not only take a stand against injustice but I stand for justice, where daily my life is surrendered and consecrated so completely to Christ that He can freely accomplish through me anything He desires, where I show up, live up, step up, speak up, love up, lift up, until transformation takes place.
…For, if darkness considers light to be troublesome then look out, for by the power of God, HERE COMES TROUBLE!
Growing in the hair and now
- Listen to your hair
One of the things I could have never anticipated on this journey of under-standing and loving the natural texture of my hair are the life lessons I’m being awakened to. So much of life is intertwined, natural principles can help us grasp the things we can’t see or touch, like the emotional and spiritual.
One of the lessons I learnt recently is to listen to the sound of my hair. The test is to take sections of my hair, apply pressure by gently rubbing it together, and just listen. Even though its appearance may not indicate it, if my hair is lacking moisture it produces a dry, louder-than-usual brittle sound, which, if left untreated will eventually cause damage to my hair.
My aha moment? Listen carefully to my words, spoken and unspoken when I feel pressured. Listen not only to what I say but how I say it. As important, listen carefully to what the people in my life are saying and how it is being say. There is a lot of hurt that can be hidden beneath humor. A lot of anger can be stuffed in silence. Unappreciation and frustration are sometimes unleashed in sudden, unexpected outbursts… and if we are not listening, we can miss the signs that something is lacking in our lives or in the lives of the people we love.
Growing in the here and now — that is , accepting the challenge and learning from the places, people and situations at the moment– suggests we listen and then discipline ourselves to take action when we hear that loud, brittle sound. So I applied a deep conditioner “Deep SOULutions” from Natural Girls Rock to my hair, slipped on a plastic cap, then for about 4 hours I allowed the conditioner to soften and restore moisture. I then fixed my hair in a protective style — twists, to minimize its exposure to daily wear and tear and help facilitate growth.
If we endeavor to grow, our journey will provide us with an abundance of opportunities. I challenge you to take this simply hair lesson and apply it now to those brittle-sounding areas in your life.
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